A520.1.6.RB_John Marshall

As I mentioned in my earlier post, I have a lot of work to do.  I think that I will be learning more about myself this next nine weeks than I have to date.  I find that I put myself in a bracket that is created through what I think people expect me to be, especially since having children.  I am confident yet lost, not sure how that happens but it does and has.  In regards to the Five Core Aspects of Self-Awareness, I feel that my struggles lie in Emotional Intelligence and Core Self-Evaluation.  I have been lying to myself for such a long time about what I know and/or understand about myself, and will really have to dig deep into self-evaluation to begin to grow again.  I feel that my values, cognitive style, and attitude toward change  are on the right track and in-line with who I think I really am. I am a good-hearten person who genuinely wants the best for his family and those around him.  This covers many aspects of the values segment in that I make decisions that I know my children would approve of, and that could never harm them. I seem to fall in the gap for cognitive style, I like to think of myself as having a Knowing cognitive style yet have a lot of the attributes of the other two. As I further evaluate myself I will be able to narrow these down to one dimension while avoiding the possible liabilities associated with them.  The attitudes towards change section confused me a bit,  especially in regards to the internal and external locus of control.  I rate in both aspects, according to the questionnaire.  I do take a lot of weight for my achievements and for my mistakes yet I do not always accept that I am solely responsible for these things, many outside influences affect not only my decisions but also the outcomes.

A520.1.2.RB_John Marshall

I have a long way to go!  This is the first assessment of self-awareness that I done, surprisingly, and I have found that I have the emotional intelligence of a new born.  This was rather surprising to me because I have held the torch many times for projects and programs and have never even considered self-evaluation to be to important.  I always hold to my competencies such as program analysis and resource management on my arm and lead with MY GOALS as the criteria for an end result.  This evaluation sheds new light on my short comings and I think that it will allow me to be more aware of my surroundings.
I do like getting feedback from other members of a group but have never tried to evaluate others emotional competencies to allow me to better connect to them and  in turn produce a product that has been thoroughly evaluated before submission.  I feel that I have always been "lucky" in my results and have received kudos for my product, but the difference may have been missed job opportunities or at least superior submissions which could have put the lime light more on me and my groups for future considerations.
I was not surprised by some of the results, especially in my fore-mention competencies. I take pride in my successes and the accolades that have resulted in turn. I have not always given praise to others for the work that they do and may have, in some cases, taken credit away from the rightful recipient.  I also feel that I have grown a lot in the past few years and that my successes have been a direct result of those who have assisted me.  The saying "it takes a village" means more to me now than ever before, and without the communities and work associates in which I depend, none of my successes would have been possible; because I am that kid who has always needed a little push to get motivated.  There is always room for growth, and I think that this class may teach me to walk a straighter line towards accomplishing goals.